Celebrity Eats (part 2) by Drgong

Celebrity Eats

Hello, welcome everyone to the best cooking show, Celebrity Eats! for those who do not know how this show works, each week we have a guest come in, and we cook a clone of her on the show. Now today guest is Taylor Swift!

Wow, lovely as ever, and on the good news, Kenye West was not invited to the show.

(Laughter from the studio crowd)

“Thank you John, I am so excited to be on this show, I grew up watching this show as a kid, and now I am on it. This is great!”

“Well now, here comes the big moment, some get embarrassed at this moment, here is Taylor Swift clone!”

Taylor Swift was a bit red faced when a nude, scared clone of her was brought in handcuffed. A few catcalls where heard. The nude blond stood under the lights, with her trying to form words from her ball gagged mouth.

“Well Taylor, this is our thanksgiving special, so we are doing a oven roaster, however, As our guest, you get to decide how the clone is prepped.”

“Well when I grew up, my mom always brought in the meat already butchered, so I had to think about it, but I think a beheading would be best.”

The clone screeched and made a failed attempt to run, but she was quickly collared and a guillotine was brought forward. Taylor and the Host John Conner led the sobbing clone and tied her to the board. Taylor watched as her own form was placed into it, and with a THUD, the head was removed with a fountain of blood shooting out.

“Wow, that was…so…Quick”

“Yes Taylor, Beheadings are quick, the Hangings are slow, and garotting is a very personal way to prep a meal.”

Commercial break

“Now we are back, we have cleaned the corpse, and now we are stuffing it. Now Taylor, tell me about the spices your using?”

“well I use Basel, sage, thyme, and mix some eggs with the bread and then just stuff it in. It is really neat to feel the still warm body and the cool stuffing.”

“Yes, it never does get old. Now we need to sew up the body, ever do needlework?”

“My mom insisted on it.”

“Good, you can help me, when we return we will show how to tie it up.”

Commercial break

“See Taylor, we tie the hands behind the corpse, then the ankles, then we take the S meat hook and rise the legs up”

“What do you use to tie it?”

“metal wire, it has to be strong enough to hold the legs in place. Now I will need your help to lift it to the oven, there we go. It is pre-heated to 375 and we will allow it to cook for a couple hours, when the centre of the stuffing reaches the appropriate temperature, she will be ready. ”

“I hope I taste good!”

“I am sure you will, Now, Taylor, tell me about your latest album..” ………………